A Stirring In My Heart in the Early Morning – 3 AM Revelations & Reflections

How do I put into words that which is incomprehensible? That which is felt deeply and known, rather than able to be explained. As if I was wrapped in the warmest blanket and could feel it warm me completely, was how the love of God that I found so tangibly covered me in this moment. Before my eyes I saw a scripture I never known before. As it was read, each word was highlighted and poured fresh fire, and hope into my spirit. This scripture though was but a glimpse of an eternal God and by seeing it, the Living Word was revealed through the written word.

This one scripture spoke of every characteristic that God is, that He is for me that which I need Him to be at that exact moment. But more than that, as the Words of Life floated before my eyes I saw the characteristics of God that others needed. This scripture revealed Him as a stronghold and strength itself. As a fortress and defense. As peace and as rest. It revealed Hi as our hope secure and the One who never fails us nor forsakes us. His mercy, goodness, grace and unfailing, unconditional love all present in this one scripture. Everything that we need God to be at any given moment was written here before me. Everything. It was literally the all-encompassing nature of the Living Word echoed through every promise of Who God is.

How do I explain the character of the One Whose definition is greater than the unknown? The One Who cannot be explained because He is beyond comprehension. Him who lives in me Who gives me peace and rest, Who restores, redeems, and sets free. Him who pulls me closer to His heart and wraps me in His love. He Who is outside of time, yet inside the very heart of the matter of my earthly situation. The One Who lives inside me as my Comforter, yet is also a piercing sword that cuts my heart. His perfect covenant brands me with His fire and there is an imprint of love that I am marked by.

“God”, I pray, “Give me Your words”, all the while I neglect to open my heart to understand His Word. But Jesus is the Living Word that is alive in me… Alive in each one of us. We know life because we know the Sustainer. We have hope because Jesus did rise up from the grave when He defeated death forever and now nothing could ever keep Him down and if He is alive in us, then nothing will ever hold us down either, but we are victorious by His Blood! If Christ conquered death and He lives in us, then how can our lives not be lived for Him? For it is by His Spirit inside of us that we have the reason for breathing. In the Name of Jesus, there is life abundantly and that will never end! In Him, there is a love that is stronger than death and nothing can ever separate us from and a hope so secure that can never be overcome or rendered defeated.

So like the vision of the written word that revealed the all-encompassing nature of the Living Word, we can take heart and know that our God is everything we will ever need Him to be in every situation and in every season!

He’s what we need and always so much more.

Soaring into Joy

I love flying. I love traveling by plane and getting to where I am going. I love looking out the window and seeing a view of the most captivating sight. I love flying through the clouds and watching sunbeams dance across the different layers of the fluffy covering. I am also that one person who enjoys turbulence. It’s strange but I find every aspect of flying is a time where the Lord fills me with increased joy.

Usually when I fly, I focus on finding the sun, or rather the Son, outside my window, but this time, I felt led to focus on the clouds and shadows they produced. So I did just that.

On top of the clouds, the rays of the sun danced across the layers of clouds and jumped from one to the next. Watching this fun spectacle filled me with inexpressible, uncontainable joy. It also made me think about Joy itself.

On the top of the clouds, the warmth of the Son is tangible and the joy rises up from through the clouds. But what about beneath the clouds in the shadowland below?

Where there is shadows, there is usually a dark covering. It is the same in the spiritual realm too. When there is shadows in our hearts, it is hard to be joyful. It is hard to dance when we don’t see the Light like we do when we are enveloped in the sunbeams on top of the clouds.

But that’s what is so amazing about our God. He is our joy complete. When we find ourselves rejoicing as we dance with sunbeams above the clouds, it is because He is filling us with His joy. When we are searching with no success for the sun to shine beneath the clouds’ shadows, He gives us His Joy in knowing that His Light shines inside of us so there is no darkness stronger than Him in us, which means we are filled with His light wherever we go.

Therefore, our joy is not dependent upon seeing the Son or feeling His warmth, but our ability to be joyful when the shadows block our view of His radiant light. Joy is an outlook that shifts our perspective. It is a lifestyle that does not rely on what we face or what shadow we find ourselves shaded by, but relies on an internal knowing that the Light inside of us can never be stolen, no matter how dark the covering over us is.

Joy is a way of seeing life through a heavenly perspective where we can know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God is faithful and He is transforming our darkness into His marvelous light. Joy is the supernatural strength in the midst of the trial. It is the knowledge that God is always greater and no matter how hard the rains fall, He is still with us, bringing us through in victory. Joy is the constant reminder that in Him, we are overcomers and every trial we experience is not going to deplete us but will be a testimony of how God always comes through!

Let that sink in next time you find yourself under the clouds. Being under the clouds does not mean that God can’t reach you. If nothing can separate us from His love, and He is a joyful God, then what storm can be greater than the infilling of the fruit of the joy that He gives us as a weapon of war?

I think the shadowlands remind us, that we are cloud dwellers and to come up higher when the clouds get lower. Sometimes finding joy in the midst of the storm is the only way to get through that trial.

We are meant to focus on the Son but need to learn how to find Him when all we see is darkness over us for even in the darkest hour He is with us.

So whether you find yourself dancing on the clouds illuminated by the Son, or seeking breakthrough from the shadows that threaten to steal your joy, know that the One who fills you with His joy never runs out and will provide you what you need wherever you find yourself. Just ask!

“You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.”

Psalms 16:11

“rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer,”

Romans 12:12

“For you will go out with joy And be led forth with peace; The mountains and the hills will break forth into shouts of joy before you, And all the trees of the field will clap their hands.”

Isaiah 55:12

“Those who sow in tears shall reap with joyful shouting.”

Psalms 126:5

“These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full.”

John 15:11

“and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory,”

1 Peter 1:8

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,”

Galatians 5:22

“Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,”

James 1:2

The song that was the inspiration for this:

The Final 30%

The other day as I was finishing up my workout, I felt like my lungs would give out on me. My parched state threatened to get the best of me, forcing me to conclude my workout earlier than anticipated. Every third minute or maybe every 30 seconds (it felt like three minutes had passed), I would have to remind myself that I was so close to reaching the goal of completing the workout I was doing. The last 30% of the workout felt like it lasted forever and it was a matter of either giving into everything in me begging me to end the task at hand or push through every plea of my body. I’d like to say the choice was easy to make but with every step, one more appeal to quit was made.

What kept me going was the little notification that would pop up telling me how far I had to go, which compared to what I had already completed, seemed easy. It wasn’t. That final push was the most difficult part of the entire workout.

When I finally did reach the goal, I was amazed. I looked at how much I had done and suddenly all the strain and pressure to give up before I reached the end was replaced with the feeling of overcoming and finishing strong.

Although the last 30% was harder than the whole workout up until this point and my ability to push past the pain was growing dimmer each moment, I closed my eyes, said a prayer for strength, and gave the final stretch into God’s hands. Then the coolest thing happened, He brought me through. I imagine it was like I had given my all, and when I was ready to give up completely, that is where the Lord came to my rescue and took me the rest of the way.

Asking God to help me did not just make the final distance easier, but I knew that it was possible, despite the pain crying out for me to stop the torture I was causing myself. I realized that by prayer and surrendering my pain to Jesus, I could reach the finish line that seemed so close, yet so far. And it was the longest 30% of my life but I finish strong because I didn’t finish in my strength but God’s!

Have you ever felt like this? Like you would not be able to reach your goal because your physical state would win against your will to persevere? Have you ever felt like you want to just give up because what is ahead looks impossible to overcome?

It is in those moments when everything is telling us to give up, that hope whispers, “you’re almost there, don’t give up now. It’s all going to be worth the pain if you just keep going!” However, when every fiber of our being is screaming to stop, it can be hard to hear the tiny voice saying the opposite.

But something important to remember is that when we are almost at the finish line, that is when everything we face becomes the most challenging. It is when the sun is about to break through that the clouds seem that much more unbearable. It is right before the top of the mountain finally comes into view that the path seems the steepest and roughtest.

When we reach the end though, doesn’t victory seem that much greater? Doesn’t the road we traveled down up to this point seem so far behind us once we reach the peak? Doesn’t water taste so much sweeter after being in the desert for so long?

So when we are faced with obstacles and opposition, may we remember that breakthrough, the thing we were striving and reaching for is closer than we know.

I want to challenge you right now to think of something in the past you had to deal with or go through and I want you to think about how it was that you got through that season. It wasn’t because you had the determination although that played a part. It wasn’t because you are strong although you are. It was the abundant grace of a God who takes us through the fire because He knows our dross holds us back and takes us through deep waters because He knows the devil can’t swim.

Where we are now, is solely because God loves us so much that He takes us to higher heights and further horizons by asking us to trust Him in the process, no matter what that looks like. A cool thing about the Lord, is He will NEVER take you 70% of the way only to leave you for the last 30%. He will not do that! Ever! Instead, our God will take you as far as you can go physically and then take you the rest of the way in His strength. It is when we reach our limits and cannot go any further that Jesus takes our burdens, our weakness, our tired state and grants us his supernatural strength to finish the race we started. We can only complete the race in the strength and grace of our God, a God who runs the remainder of the way with us on His back.

So now let me to leave you with a few questions:

What is it you are moving towards right now?

What will it take to get there and at what cost?

Are you willing to push past the pain and difficulty of getting there?

Despite everything telling you to stop now while you are ahead, can you hear the little whisper of hope pushing you to keep going?

When you can go no further, remember that there is a strength in you that is not your own; you have the strength of Jesus inside you. In his strength, nothing is impossible and the pain you feel now, will be worth it all. Don’t give up, for you are so close and after you cross the finish line, you will be stronger in the Lord because He brought you through!

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 2 Timothy 4:7

They who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

“And not only this, but [with joy] let us exult in our sufferings and rejoice in our hardships, knowing that hardship (distress, pressure, trouble) produces patient endurance;”
‭‭ROMANS‬ ‭5:3‬ ‭

“Rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer,”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭12:12‬ ‭

I find that the strength of Christ’s explosive power infuses me to conquer every difficulty.
‭Philippians‬ ‭4:12

My Breathe is Eternal

You have replaced My life breathing air with temporary breathing devices. Instead of taking a breath of fresh air, you have settled for what will not last, and that which can never give you life has become your source of existence. I am the Only True Life-Giving Source and only My breathe in your lungs will satisfy the desperate need that you have.

Photo credits Daniela Suarez my beautiful friend!

Cough up the breathing tubes. This is not the life I want for you, beloved. I have True Life to breathe into you, but artificial air is in the way of Me reaching you. Stop breathing in polluted air. You have been breathing in dead air.

Imagine holding your breath until you can no longer. When you do this you are rejecting fresh air. Air that breathes life into your lungs. My breath is life to your being and life without Me is like holding your breath, yet expecting to breathe. It is a contradiction and living like this is living in foolish ignorance. There is so much more life for you to receive than this!

My Precious Child, what I have for you is beyond every physical limit of this world; what I have for you is True Life. I want to breathe My life for you into your lungs. I am the One who breathed life into you in the beginning, and who has always sustained you and will always be your source of being sustained. You have replaced My life breathing air with temporary breathing devices. Instead of taking a breath of fresh air, you have settled for what will not last, and that which can never give you life has become your source of existence. I am the Only True Life-Giving Source and only My breathe in your lungs will satisfy the desperate need that you have.

Beloved, before you breathe in My life into your lungs, you need to exhale and release all the artificial air you have allowed to clog your lungs. It is not My design for you to breathe in death. Some of My children do not realize how much death they have allowed in their souls by holding their breath and not letting My Spirit fill them again. The saddest part is many do not understand they are excluding My Life-Giving Nature at all. It is so easy to get stuck in a cycle of taking shallow breathes and thinking that this is all that there is. How it grieves Me to stand on the outside looking in, as they search for My provision but reject My Presence.

Take deep breathes of Me, fill your lungs with all I have for you. Fill your being with My love for you, My faithfulness, My unfailing nature. Fill every crevice of your heart with the sacrifice I paid for you so you could live eternally with Me.

Are you ready to inhale My life and breathe? Precious child, I have so much more for you than you have settled for. I want to breathe life everlasting back into your lungs. I want to breathe My plans into your mind. I want to breathe My love into every crevice of your soul. I want to breathe My heart into your heart if you will only let Me fill you and be your breath. Will you let me breathe fire on the coal of your heart altar?

The Heartbeat and its Symphony

“A sovereign hush quieted the earth as all of creation waited expectantly upon its King.”

As I laid cozily in my blankets, the Lord kept telling me to capture what these words meant through creation’s beauty.

“It’s so subtle that it can’t capture it. You can see the heartbeat of God but you can’t actually capture it in all it’s glory”

I love waking up and watching the sunrise, but on this morning, wanted nothing more than to snuggle back into the warmth of my blanket. When I did finally get up, I understood what God was trying to show to me.

The water was moving as if it was gently breathing. The trees joined in the song the wind conceived, in a melody that seemed to capture both the stillness and the noise of the environment.

In this timeless moment, my senses came alive at the scene painted.

The earth was brought to life as part of a symphony that was being orchestrated before my eyes in the calm. A masterpiece was being spoken into existence at the command of the King.

All of nature readily answered the Conductor’s invitation to join in the great ensemble carrying the Lord’s symphony throughout the earth.

Each piece in creation had a crucial part in the song that was being written. Each part added something unique to the sweet sight and sound.

Defying the Pre-Conceived Mold

It’s time to walk out in boldness. It’s time to break out of the pre-conceived mold and claim our true identity in Christ; the one he gave us before we were even born. You have a calling! It’s unique and planned specifically for you to walk in. But how many people never fully access their purpose because they allowed the world to steal their true destiny in turn for a man-made one?

Like the cliché of trying to fit a square peg in a round hole there are times when the world around me has tried to fit me to their pre-conceived mold. Going off that analogy here is one to fully express this picture; imagine the instead of a square peg you are the one being forced into a different shaped hole, or rather, role. That’s how it feels.

It is impossible to be who you are made to be when you are being pulled in several competing directions. It cannot continue but this action will stretch you thinner in every direction. But in addition to being stretched beyond what is healthy, a part of you is taken away to “help” you better fit into another’s mold. A part of your identity is stripped from you when others are trying to change you to meet their expectations.

The downside is when you try to fight for that piece of who you are, you will fail to meet said expectations and maybe begin to loosen your grip of that thing about yourself you fought so hard to hold on to. Eventually you will allow yourself to be remolded to fit someone else’s idea of who you should be. A piece of you, if not a large portion, disappears. That which once helped define who you are, is lost as a result of feeling like you were failing what was expected. Maybe you let go of something of something that meant the world to you, something that set you apart or made you different.

When we let go of those pieces to appease others, we give up our identity and it becomes much easier for others to take away more of the character traits that once defined us.

People will always have their own set of expectations for others to meet. Some are more realistic and others are simply unrealistic if we are to cling to what we are called to be. I have let the world around me shape me for so long that there are parts of me that I have hidden in order to play the part desired of me. But that’s the thing, it’s simply a play and inside it’s not who I want to be. It’s not who I feel I’m meant to be but it’s the role that others have assigned me as insincere as it may be.

Maybe you have been here where you feel like who you are is hidden under the rubble that others may have thrown on you. The dreams in your heart remain unknown to others because it would defy what is expected of you. But by fitting someone’s idea of who you should be, you are denying the true identity God placed inside of you when He made you!

The person you are meant to be is not a common art piece but a unique one of a kind masterpiece. Many times we fail to see ourselves as the Lord sees us and neglect to walk in all we are called to be. As a result we miss something that could have defined who we are, if we had only stepped boldly into it, instead of cowardly stepping back and letting man define us.

It’s time to walk out in boldness. It’s time to break out of the pre-conceived mold and claim our true identity in Christ; the one he gave us before we were even born. You have a calling! It’s unique and planned specifically for you to walk in. But how many people never fully access their purpose because they allowed the world to steal their true destiny in turn for a man-made one?

The Lord is calling you to fit in to one mold; His. It’s not restricting or limiting. It was made with you in mind and is flexible to bend with you as you continue to grow into your identity and chase your destiny Christ placed before you.

Do you feel it rising in your gut or has it been dormant for so long that it’s on the verge of extinction due to neglect? How badly do you want to claim that which is yours? That which was created to fit to you, not mold you to it’s already hardened shape? Are you ready to stand for who God made you to be or will you become hardened by a mold that was never meant to contain you?

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made” Psalm 139:14a

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10

“Who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was granted us in Christ Jesus from all eternity” 2 Timothy 1:9

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:5

“So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them;” Genesis 1:27a

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9

“Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is.” 1 John 3:2

White Noise

Sometimes we get so used to being lulled to sleep by white noise that we forget we are meant to be awake. The noise that defines our life is not the sweet sound we used to hear.

During the younger years of childhood, a white noise machine or some sort of rhythmic noise is helpful to get the child to stay asleep. Even adults may use noise machines to sleep more soundly or simply because they enjoy them.

Just like being lulled to sleep by one of these machines, much of society has grown accustom to the white noise of life. The noises become so present that life before them seems like it never existed in the first place. As the noise continues to grow louder, the sound of the sacred silence we once listened to is lost.

When we don’t give God our heart’s affection and attention first, then we allow the background noise to consume the ability to hear His still small voice. He is trying to speak to us and we try and listen but our ears are filled with clutter.

Our ears have been progressively growing more and more deaf to his whisper. Our hands are becoming idol and no longer boast of the work of the Master. Our senses have gone dull as the world sings it’s ensnaring lullaby, allowing a complacent nature to form inside us.

When did I allow all this babble to bring a sound barrier between me and My King? I am made to be a warrior who walks in power and authority of the One True Living God! I was made to be more than happily blissful in my ignorance.

But how can I look like my King and carry his authority, if I cannot hear his quiet whisper? How can I hear him speak to me if my ears are blocked and I have forgotten the sound of his voice?

It is time to turn off the white noise machine I have allowed to put me to sleep. It is time to take up the whole armor of God, as I take my place on the battlefield, once again. I’m tired of being tired. I don’t want to speak of longing to hear the Master Commander give His orders, only be deaf to all He wants to say.

When there is a poor connection on our direct line to Heaven, we know it is time to reengage our senses and get rid of the things slowing down the communication. This is not an easy thing to do. Sometimes it means making a conscious decision to rid ourselves of those things that have lulled us to sleep.

Whatever it is, it needs to lose its grip on us. There are endless options for things that block our senses; music, radio, tv, life in all its grandeur. It’s easy to blindly enter into, but difficult to escape from. Satan knows that if he keeps our senses blocked and dull then we cannot reach our true power and unlock our identity in all we are created to be in Christ.

What gets in the way? Does life get in the way of God or do we believe God gets in the way of our life? In other words, have I allowed living how I want to live to be more important than living how God desires me to live?

Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?” Then I said, “Here am I. Send me!”
⁃ Isaiah 6:8

For from days of old they have not heard or perceived by ear, Nor has the eye seen a God besides You, Who acts in behalf of the one who waits for Him.
⁃ Isaiah 64:4

Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.
⁃ Ephesians 6:11

So that “‘they may indeed see but not perceive, and may indeed hear but not understand, lest they should turn and be forgiven.’”
⁃ Mark 4:12

“for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says, “Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.””

– Ephesians 5:14